on robinhood chain
she takes 5% off every trade, goes shopping, and u wake up with real stonk sitting in ur wallet. no claim button. no staking. no quest to farm. u literally do nothing. good boy. cmok
not live yet ser
ur present
she had every stonk on the chain to pick from and she took the biggest company on planet earth. one name, the whole bag, every single time. she aint diversifying, she aint scared.
biggest company on earth and every other name on that list is standing in line begging them for chips. picking it aint a strategy its a personality.
every ai u talk to, every feed u doomscroll, the datacentres behind all of it, running on their silicon. she just moved u to the getting paid side instead of the paying side. finally.
deepest stonk market on this whole chain. .. sitting in liquidity and .. traded in a day. a payout lands within half a percent of real price so almost all of it gets to u instead of getting eaten by slippage.
how she spoils u
someone just traded $MOMMY. buy or sell idc
took my 5%. contract holds it not me, im not touching it
wat u doing with it
shopping. all of it into nvidia at market
all of it?? no split??
i dont do baskets
check ur wallet its already sitting there
i didnt even do anything tho
ik. just keep holding. cmok
real talk: 5% tax on every buy and every sell, gets swapped and shoved into nvidia, then sent out to holders. u never get paid in $MOMMY. u get paid in stonk.
straight off the chain, not from us
ROBINHOOD CHAIN · STONK TOKENS
reading the chain rn
ty for holding
cmok cmok
thats the contracts own counter of everything its taken in and spent on stonk for u lot. not our number, its number.
read off the chain every 20 seconds. only goes up, never down, we cant touch it. if it disagrees with anything else on this page then believe the receipt and not us.
ask mommy anything
nah. she pushes, u dont pull. it just lands in ur wallet on its own. theres no claim button because theres nothing to claim. go back to sleep.
because splitting a payout 5 ways buys 5 tiny bags of 5 things and pays slippage 5 times like a clown. one name bought deep means more of the money actually reaches u. also she has taste and she would like that on the record.
u own robinhood stock tokens. theyre tokenised debt securities issued by robinhood assets (jersey) limited. u get the price exposure, u dont get the actual share and u dont get voting rights. thats robinhoods setup, not ours, and its the same for every stonk token on this chain. just know what ur holding ser.
because a reward is only worth the price it can be bought at. nvidia is the deepest stonk market on this chain by a mile so the payout buys near real price. a thinner name would spend half ur present pushing its own price against u. thats not spicy thats just donating.
ye, u need at least 10,000 $MOMMY to get counted in a distribution. its there so the payout dont get ground into dust across 5000 empty wallets.
5% buy, 5% sell. thats the only thing paying for ur presents. nothing gets minted, theres no treasury topping it up, no unlocks.
u keep everything she already gave u. it went to ur wallet, its urs. u just stop getting more. she will notice tho. dont do it.